Do Something Terrifying
Posted by Cracks Let The Light Come In , Monday, October 7, 2013 5:30 PM
"Risking is always a part of dreaming. We show more of who God is when we take risks. We have to continually take those risks and not be satisfied with what we have."
Today I took a risk.
Today I did something that scared me.
Today I quit my job.
I told my employer that I needed to work somewhere that paid better since I am going to be paying back school loans in the near future. She said that she completely understood and wished me well on my journey, saying she would miss me but would do the same thing I have chosen to do. Although money is a large reason why I decided to hang up my green apron, there is another reason.
For the last month, I have been battling an idea. I have been wondering if what I have been doing has meant anything to anyone. Even though I'm constantly surrounded by people, I find myself brokenhearted at how lonely I am. I go to church on Sundays, but have to leave early to go to work or show up just in time for youth group on Sunday nights because I was coming from work. I have not been able to truly rest for about two months and haven't been able to invest in relationships.
Yesterday was one of the best days I have had in a long time. I had yesterday off (the first Sunday I have had off since I started working at Starbucks), and was able to spend time with my small group after church for lunch and then joined some of the junior high students on an adventure. We planned to go to the Pumpkin Festival in downtown Hamilton, but most of the festival had ended by the time we arrived. We headed back to church, but not before we stopped at the Miami River Dam in Hamilton. I was amazed at how much power and force the river had. I was completely mesmerized by the water and wondered if I had the power to change huge oak trees into driftwood by the mere force of my waves (metaphorically, of course).
Yesterday I remembered what it felt like to live again. I was blessed with time, after hearing a challenge from all staff members of my church, to think and sort out what I had heard. I was able to finally be still enough to hear the LORD's voice call sweetly to me and usher me back into His presence. I was able to solidify all the ramblings inside my head and my heart for the first time in months. It may seem strange, but I felt as though God gave me permission to quit my job. I had been ignoring Him for the last few months and wasn't able to commune with His people. I always knew I wouldn't stay at Starbucks forever, but I didn't know it would be so short lived.
No, I don't officially have a job. Some of you may think I'm ridiculous to quit one job without having another...and you may be right. I have learned so much from serving thousands of people coffee and pastries every week. I have learned how hard the people behind the counter work and how impatient the people in front of it are. I feel very good about my decision, and feel lighter somehow. I have been able to concentrate on turning in and completing every detail of my Team Expansion application. I'm excited about what's to come.
Have a great day go do something that terrifies you, and remember: always tip your barista.
